Prayer Request Time
I remember sitting outside in a circle of lawn chairs one summer night in 2013 listening to members of my new church community group exchange prayer requests. I’ve been in small group prayer situations like this my whole life, so I was really only slightly engaged. One guy probably needs to find a new job. Another guy will probably mention a sick family member. And these are all serious matters, so we’ll sincerely express momentary concern, say a quick prayer, and move on.
But after the first guy voiced his desire for us to pray for some type of health matter he was facing, the group leader responded in a way that surprised me. He said something like, “Ok, let’s definitely pray about that” but then followed with “What do you think God is doing in your life as a result of this health situation?” The guy who asked for prayer hesitated to answer. He was stumped. And I think I was also.
Are we supposed to ask that question in prayer time? Prayer request time is normally just a group of people taking turns voicing how they want God to change their circumstances, not discovering how God is changing them.
Blessings
A couple years afterwards, I read an incredible book by Laura Story called “When God Doesn’t Fix It.” The book and Laura’s award-winning song “Blessings” were inspired by her husband’s battle with brain cancer and permanent short-term memory loss. And the title of the book says it all. The plans that Laura had for her life, career, and family were completely different from God’s. She prayed for a lot of things that never happened and endured a lot of things she couldn’t understand. The book is a beautiful and painful unveiling of how God taught her to rest in His sovereignty. It was a total game changer for me.
It’s human nature to wish for and pray for things like comfort, safety, and the path of least resistance. Who would hunt for hardship or pursue adversity? The problem is that we don’t really improve in comfortability. We see little progress without resistance. We don’t change until we are challenged. It’s just God’s design.
My Wish
Country music trio Rascal Flatts had a hit song called “My Wish” in 2006. It was played a lot at life milestone celebrations like graduations and anniversaries. Here are some of the lyrics.
I hope the days come easy, and the moments pass slow.
And each road leads you where you want to go.
My wish for you is that this life becomes all that you want it to.
Your dreams stay big. Your worries stay small.
You never need to carry more than you can hold.
Now, I’m a huge Rascal Flatts fan, and I love this song. And I totally get why you would wish these things for someone you love. But this is just not the way the real world works. People whose “days come easy” and who “never need to carry more “ than they can hold don’t really exist. And if they did, they would inevitably be underdeveloped, inexperienced, stunted human beings.
What a joy killer, right? But it’s true! All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy. But all play and no work will make Jack an intolerably shallow kid. “My wish” should really be that you are challenged, stretched, pushed, and tested because that’s how we grow.
Lesser Things
After Job in the Old Testament had lost his home, his health, his wealth, and his children, his wife asked him why he didn’t just curse God and die. At his life’s lowest moment, with his body covered in painful boils, Job answered his wife’s question with one of his own: “Should we accept only good from God and not adversity?” What an amazing perspective! In the middle of indescribable pain, Job knew that God, in His infinite wisdom, was the maker of the sunshine and the rain, the author of the joy and the pain.
In the first verse of “Blessings,” Laura describes some of our prayers for comfort and safety and prosperity. But then she asks us to consider that God may not always answer these prayers in the way we expect because He loves us way too much to give us “lesser things.”
The lyrics swell with faith and endurance. Laura has learned that God is good, and He does only what is good, even when He doesn’t “fix” everything in the way we want. There’s nothing wrong with praying for health and safety and traveling mercies. There’s nothing wrong with asking God for protection or relief from pain in a backyard community group prayer circle. We have this Friend Who petitions us to cast all these cares on Him. But we do this with the understanding that God may have something greater for us just beyond our place of comfort.
We pray, understanding that God is ultimately more concerned about our holiness than our temporary happiness. And for this reason, He doesn’t always “fix” things as we would. He doesn’t always heal us or prosper us or give to us in the ways we ask Him. Sometimes, what we think is best just isn’t.
And here’s why. What God wants to give us is so much better than what we think we need. We’re asking for a Happy Meal when God wants to give us a smorgasbord. We’re asking for a swimming pool, but God wants to show us the Pacific Ocean. We want something from Him, but He wants to give us Himself.
So it’s good to listen together and pray together. It’s good to ask God for mercy and healing. But it’s also good to be thankful when He doesn’t give us “lesser things” if the real blessings are in the raindrops.
